yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
I need to stop coming to work sober
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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