i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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