lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
