You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
