you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
