She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Randomize
