No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
