Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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