So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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