@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm too high and old for this...
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
