When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
