She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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