you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
