Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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