butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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