yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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