my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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