I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
That was an excessively violent trivia night
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
