I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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