What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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