your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
