That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
