Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
