I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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