quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize