speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
We have started to decorate penises.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
