Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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