And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Randomize