i just wanna soil my oats bro
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
