My boss' voice literally gives me gas
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'm passing your future prison.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
