When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I had to cum in my sink.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
