He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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