i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
