I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize