Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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