So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize