Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
