Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
