apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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