Too much gin, very little bucket
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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