So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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