i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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