she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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