on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
