Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
