Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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