in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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