So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
