Sponge bath it is.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
