Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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